Rise Up With L.Y.
What’s Your Monster
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Your monster story might be all that someone needs to see to make a positive change and confront the obstacles to their happiness. We all have monsters. That is why I am on a quest to help you discover and confront yours. Share your story below and let’s kick your monster’s tail together!
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Fear was my biggest monster of ALL! When I decided to step out on faith and do what I know I’d been called to do, Fear showed up. The fear of the unknown. The fear of failing. The fear of change. The fear of what people would say, think or do. At times, Fear kept me replaying the past, and worrying about the future. Fear stripped me of my courage, told me that I would never succeed. Fear forced me to repress my dreams; told me it was okay to feel what I was feeling, that I had every right to. I almost liked Fear because at least I didn’t have to confront what I knew in my heart to be true. Fear had no boundaries, no respect for what I truly wanted to do. And when I got right down to it, Fear had paralyzed me, and I was stuck.
Worry became my companion. Showed up all throughout the day, telling me what I can’t do, what I shouldn’t do, that I wasn’t good enough. Filled my head with all kinds of nonsense and negative self talk. Even when I tried positive mind feed to defeat Worry, Worry reminded me of why it wouldn’t work, couldn’t work, that I would fail. Worry confiscated my self esteem, crippled my self confidence, and terrorized me. Worry was so ingrained in my head that I actually started to believe her. It had gotten so bad thatI allowed Worry to conspire with Fear.
Broke. Oh Broke! After encountering so many obstacles and set backs, Broke left me feeling spiritually, physically, mentally, emotionally, and literally, financially bankrupt. Broke distorted my views, warped my self-worth, and left me feeling downright pitiful. Broke not only made me feel worthless, but clouded my mind, making me believe that I didn’t have the fortitude nor the energy to go on. Never in my life had I felt so low. Broke just had a way of snatching hope right out of me!
Doubt wavered between Worry and Fear. One day she was up, the next day she was down, allowing Worry and Fear to keep me from believing in myself. But I eventually stopped allowing Doubt in my head. In time I embraced affirmations like: I can do this. I’m better than that. I will succeed—opening my mind to a whole new way of thinking. Soon I would begin to learn to dismiss Doubt and trust a simple word. Believe!
When I’d done all I knew how to do, Despair just reached into my chest, yanked my heart out, and forced me to my knees. It was the saddest time of my life. And every time I mustered the energy to get back up, to try to talk myself out of it, Worry, Fear, Doubt and even Crazy showed up and I felt trapped.
Lonely was one of the most numbing and miserable monsters. There’s nothing like feeling as though you’re in a room surrounded by a sea of people, but you feel invisible, so alone. Like there’s this invisible wall around you and there’s no one you can talk to. You feel unattached, guarded, unloved. It’s downright dreadful.
There’s good Angry and bad Angry. Good healthy anger can propel you to take action, promotes growth and even force you to stand up for yourself. Bad anger can be destructive, self-defeating and toxic. Know the difference. If Angry causes you to scream, cuss, throw things or be pissed off, then that’s the toxic, corrosive anger. That anger will kill you! Healthy anger, on the other hand, is the kind that you should embrace occasionally. Sometimes you just have to get a little pissed off in order to get to the root of some stuff like fear, frustration and forgiveness. Just be clear about what’s prompting Angry.
Guilt hands-down is one of the most saddest monsters of all. She will drag you into an endless pit of anguish, shame and pity. When we feel responsible for a behavior or action that we regret, we carry a load of remorse, constantly reminding ourselves what we couldn’t, wouldn’t, shouldn’t have done. Guilt makes us play the same movie over and over again in our heads. Guilt turns our sorry into sorrow, and force us to drag it around like a ball and chain.